Also, I think that part of it is that you or I may realize in our reverie that we were a better person or may have handled things better than one may have thought.
Recently a friend commented how good I was with my boys when I stayed with them at his place to evade a hurricane in our home town. I was amazed. He said I was very calm even though one of my boys was acting up and my ex was calling and calling trying to get me to put my younger boy on a plane to his wedding in the middle of a hurricane. I said no, so finally our host turned off his phone. I was not being nasty. We were in a difficult spot and that was asking too much. We were in the midst of an evacuation.
I can think of other times like when David got over whooping cough and being in the hospital. He refused to take his jeans or shoes off even in a hospital bed, so Ted and I went to Walmart to get him some goofy pajama bottoms, but David has never even put those on. They ended up Ted's.
I could go on and on, but you know what I mean. I guess I miss my kids. They are grown now. I need to let go and move on with my life I guess.
I think you have to get out there and make stuff happen. I just have to figure out how, but I'm a survivor. I will.
The picture I added is a good memory. The dhuni at the beach. I'm playing the guitar, my legs are freezing because it is winter and Ted is around somewhere. I cannot see a thing, because RP makes your rods and cones not work right in the dark. Still I felt like teenagers and I could surely see the fire. Thanks to Nancy for the photos.
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